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Wednesday, May 27, 2009

You Gotta Believe Me / Book Fourteen Opening

I'd tell you about the gremlins who snuck in the house and tied me up, threw me in a closet and replaced me with a robotic clone. While the clone took care of my family, and I struggled in the dark to get free, they looted and pillaged my home, which kept me from blogging and putting up the video. But I'm not sure you'd believe me, even if it really did happen.

Here's how I got free, I struggled against the ties for a long time, then remembered that my husband keeps a Swiss army knife in the pocket of one of his jackets. I located the jacket, tore it from its hanger and groped behind my back through his pockets (ooh) and found it. I opened the knife, cutting myself in the process since I couldn't see what I was doing. Now bleeding, I slowly gnawed through the heavy ropes with the knife.

When it was finally done, my arms were tired and my hand was red with blood. I took the ties from my feet and removed the tape over my mouth. I took a few minutes to gather some strength and adrenaline and then emerged from the closet, my cape immediately flying open and I marched into the kitchen, picked up that fake me and threw her through a window and clear across the yard into the street, whereupon a passing truck smashed into her spreading nuts bolts and gutty wires everywhere. My children cheered, my husband kissed me and all was right with the world.

Now that that ordeal has been overcome, I can present to you the opening of the fourteenth book:

Leave a comment or I'm gonna send the gremlins your way!

Ok I won't really, but if you do leave a comment, no matter if you join the reading or not, your name is put in for a drawing. I will announce the drawing winner next Monday, June 1st, 8:00 pm Eastern Time. How's that for scheduling?


Gordo said...

Gremlins are about the only thing we don't have in our house .. LOL

This looks great, too. :-D

furiousBall said...

I'm in :)

meno said...

I suggested that? Really? Well, i have read it recently, and it was better than i was anticipating. I thought it would be all 'goody goody i am more holy than thou,' but it wasn't.

jaded said...

If the gremlins can busy themselves eradicating sugar ants, bring 'em on.

de said...

Too bad the clone was destroyed. Once free of the evil influence of the gremlins, she could have been useful.

Tink said...

I love the "dun-dun-duuuun!" from the camera man. Lol! Count me in. :)